“No More Photos Mummy”

The day started out as any other. The sun was shining and I was feeling great about my day off with my daughter.

But when I got my phone out to take an impromptu photo of our wonderful day, I was met with the words an Instagram addicted mum never wants to hear:

“No More Photos Mummy!”

My smile dropped. It was the first time that she’d ever told me that she doesn’t want me to take her photo.

Southwold beach, Georgia throwing stones

As well as a small tear, a few thoughts rattled through my head:

  • As a mum, my one major interest is my daughter. My other interest is photography. Well that scuppers that plan then doesn’t it?
  • As a large part of me, she is entwined into my identity like a knot. But when will she untangle that knot and wriggle free? What will that leave me with?
  • Okay, so she’s only two. I’m not going to give up the ghost just yet of sharing her images but it is the first time that it’s made me think about it.

This isn’t about online safe sharing.

Sure, some people decide to block out their children’s faces, or only show their children from behind to safeguard them. But that’s not for me. I don’t share pictures of Georgia’s foof. Even I don’t want to see that.

I don’t tell you exactly where I live and I make sure that door numbers are obscured and that I’m not sharing pictures of our friends etc. But you still see us. You see the fun we have. You probably don’t even notice the measures I go to, which is the whole point.

What it is about is coming to terms with the fact that I’m sharing pictures that aren’t necessarily mine. They’re hers.

They aren’t always my memories. They are hers too.

Identity crisis.

If she stops letting me take her photo, my Instagram account and blog instantly loses its identity. If I’m not sharing her life then what is my life about?

I’m not sure you’d be interested in hearing my thoughts on who’s going to be kicked out next on Love Island.

As a parent I now largely live my life through hers. Holidays are planned around what she’d enjoy most, restaurants booked around which has the best child-friendly menu. Heaven help the restaurant that recently gave us a pot of colouring pencils that were dog-eared and all pale pink at 12pm.

Sure, we all take a moment to indulge ourselves – whether that’s a day at the spa, my daily life in the world of content marketing (read: drinking TEA!), or hobbies, but the cool things that I like sharing with people are largely related to Georgia.

Let’s face it:

Her life is far more exciting than mine.

From experience, people generally start unfollowing my Instagram account when I post pictures of myself. Would I be enough without my tiny sidekick constantly in my feed?

I created her, but she is growing into her own little person with her own feelings with every passing day. I wouldn’t change it for the world and I can’t ignore it forever.

For now, I’ll squeeze her a bit tighter and get as many photos in as possible before she starts demanding no more photos on a permanent basis

Have you gone through a similar crisis? Let me know your thoughts!

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11 Comments

  1. June 19, 2017 / 7:25 am

    I sometimes get the no more photos comments but not very often at the moment. Every parent takes photos of their children and they will continue to do so independent of sharing them on social media or not. We are recording memories. I know I love looking back at photos of me from when I was a child. I’m sure Georgia will love looking at her photos too. Maybe just try mixing things up a bit. I love all your photos not just the ones you take of Georgia. x

  2. June 21, 2017 / 7:16 am

    You can take photos of the areas around your daughter. Like if she’s blowing bubbles in the yard you focus on the bubbles and leave her out. I find even my fence in the yard is commented on when I share it. People just like looking into other people’s lives. So…let’s see what your grass looks like 😉
    #fortheloveofBLOG

  3. June 21, 2017 / 8:54 am

    L goes through stages he either says no more pictures mummy or strikes a pose and says picture me now! He loves taking his own pictures though and often gets me to take pictures of his toys. I just go with the flow and hope in the long run he still enjoys it because I’ll have to stop when he doesn’t. It’s all about him too!

  4. June 21, 2017 / 8:54 am

    L goes through stages he either says no more pictures mummy or strikes a pose and says picture me now! He loves taking his own pictures though and often gets me to take pictures of his toys. I just go with the flow and hope in the long run he still enjoys it because I’ll have to stop when he doesn’t. It’s all about him too!

  5. June 21, 2017 / 10:08 am

    Ah welcome to my life of not being able to take photos of the teens! Hence my passion for doors, cute buildings and anything else that takes my eye! I’m sure it’s just a phase. I love your photos of other things too though so guess you’ll have to add a few more of those in until she’s happy to strike a pose again. It’s a difficult one and one I very much sympathise with #fortheloveofBLOG

  6. June 21, 2017 / 10:54 am

    Oh I’m sure she’ll let you take her photo tomorrow. You know how fickle toddlers are 🙂 I feel the same as you about sharing photos though. I know some people prefer to obscure faces, but I’m happy showing them for now. #fortheloveofBLOG

  7. June 21, 2017 / 7:34 pm

    My boys love having their photos taken, though when it suits them, they enjoy looking back at them. My eldest is so taken with photography that we want to get him a camera for his birthday. I don’t post pictures of my boys online if I can help it, normally back of head type shots, or slightly obscure, but that works for me. Im sure your daughter will change her mind. I just want to say that you would be enough, and are enough with or without your daughter in your feed. xx

  8. June 21, 2017 / 8:56 pm

    Amelia is the selfie queen, I must admit! She’s just recently started to want to be the photographer, which ahs resulted in a lot of shots of me… Not so IG friendly!!! I always respect her wishes when she says no more, but I’d be lying if I said I’m not a little bit gutted by it…! #fortheloveofBLOG

  9. I get “No photos mummy” regularly. Sometimes I sneak a snap anyway – which results in a grumpy face. Sometimes I just wait until she is absorbed in something and then get some shots whilst she’s busy. It’s tricky though because as they get older it feels wrong to not respect their wishes. Often I think they are just trying to assert their authority though rather than objecting specifically to the photo. Hopefully it will pass for you soon! #fortheloveofBLOG

  10. June 22, 2017 / 8:57 pm

    Isn’t your blog and instagram account about you? Can’t you just selfie it up?
    I don’t share photos of the kids online because it’s not my image and I have no control over where it goes. My teen does share photos (which I’m not so pleased about but what can you do?). #FortheloveofBLOG

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